Satis House Hotel

THIS HOTEL IS WELL PAST IT’S SELL-BUY DATE. BAD-MANNERED OWNERS, LEAKING CEILINGS AND POOR HOUSEKEEPING. Our visit on 9 July was the stuff of nightmares. Rainwater leaking through the ground and first-floor ceilings, dirt, dust, and poor water pressure were the least of our disappointments. The final straw was being insulted by the owner, who mistakenly told us to leave the hotel at 10:30 PM. HERE'S WHAT HAPPENED: My wife was semi-naked in the bathroom when a stranger opened the door (we assumed it was locked) from the landing. He mumbled something and left. She returned to our bedroom in shock. I phoned the manager and was told: "The couple next door has been a problem all day. Leave it with me". Some minutes later, it's now 9.30 PM, we hear a furious row outside our door. It's the manager and the man next door. I went out to calm them both down. It appears that the man next door entered our bathroom because he wanted to check the fire escape: we then realised that OUR BATHROOM DOOR TO THE LANDING WAS PERMANENTLY UNLOCKED BECAUSE IT WAS ON THE FIRE ESCAPE ROUTE. In the event of a fire, guests would leave the building through our bathroom window via the unlocked door to our bathroom. I was then told by the manager that the door had never been locked. "We've never had this problem before," she said. "How do you know?" I replied. Later, my wife and I were in bed when we heard a knock on the door. It was the hotel owner. Instead of the expected apology, the owner told us we had to leave immediately. IT WAS 10.30 PM. I refused. She was insistent. I shut the bedroom door and went back to bed. I left our bedroom the following morning hoping to speak with the owner. There was no one around. It had rained overnight so I had to pick my way carefully between the many buckets containing rainwater percolating from the ceilings above. It was the same on the ground floor. After a breakfast of soggy salmon and scrambled egg, the manager reappeared to explain what had happened: she had told the owner of the "problem couple" on the first floor. The owner assumed she was referring to us and that's why she told us to leave last night. The manager was sympathetic and promised to speak with the owner when she returned. That was almost four months ago. I received an apology and a promise to refund £100 which never materialised.]

Very disappointed nothing like the photos. They must have been taken a long while ago. It took ages for someone to appear who's appearance looked scruffy. We were shown are room which cobwebs and dust everywhere. The glass in the bathroom wasn't clean still had dried toothpaste still in it. The toilet had brown marks around the rim. The dust on the fan stand was so thick we wrote 'clean me ' in it.

We were the only people at this very interesting small hotel. We came for a night just to get away. The first thing to notice is the, quite frankly, bizarre artefacts throughout the inside. From a stuffed lynx outside our room to blackamoors holding lights up in the restaurants, with all manner of oddities - painted deer heads, half stuffed pheasants and strange portraits in between. We had a lovely room, which quickly got warm when the heating was put on. Four poster comfortable bed, and a lovely big bathroom with plenty of hot water and towels. Sarah looked after us and served our evening meal, which was lovely. She was happy to chat and told us some history and information about the village We slept well and had breakfast, which was fine, cooked and served by someone different, before we left. We did try to check out with a person, but unfortunately, despite ringing the bell several times, no-one came so we left a note and went! It's an amazing place. Really quite spooky - I would have loved to have had a proper look round and felt some its history properly. I'm a bit nosy so looked up who the actual owners are. Sadly, I was not impressed with what I found out about one of the owners and their legal battle with people over the years. It may account for why it was deemed ok to have some rather offensive statues in some public areas. However, for a night or two away, this is a lovely quirky place. Maybe get rid of some ornaments and redecorate a bit more tastefully though!